Friends of Dave #142: You're Gonna Miss Me When I'm Gone
We may all be unique, but make no mistake -- we are also replaceable.
I know that many of you, like me, are American football fans. As you know, over the past month there has been one player dominating all of the headlines leading up to the first game of the season: Antonio Brown.
If you are unfamiliar with who he is, or why he has been covered so extensively, you may want to click here to read a timeline of what has transpired in order to get the most of this intro. Don't worry, the rest of us will wait for you as you get up to speed......
For some reason, this week the Antonio Brown saga reminded me of a story from early in my career. I recall one day there was a buzz spreading around the office. There had been a meeting that morning (I was not there) when our company's newly appointed president, a long time, widely respected leader within the company I'll call Big Dog, made a proclamation to those in attendance that created quite a stir amongst some employees: during this particular meeting he made a point to say "Everyone is replaceable."
Now, if you knew Big Dog, you knew that his leadership style was all about collaboration, team success and fostering a positive, innovative, empathetic work environment (which, in part, is why he ascended to the role). In so many ways, Big Dog was the embodiment of what a leader should aspire to be. So to hear about the comment he made could be seen as a little surprising and uncharacteristic. And to hear that there was some outrage being espoused amongst the troops about it was surprising as well.
I guess some people felt that the message was way too harsh. How could Big Dog completely undermine the efforts of the employees? Didn't he know how hard each person worked and how much dedication they had to our growing company? Didn't he know how important these efforts were to the success of the company and, in fact, THE VERY REASON why it was growing as fast as it was? Where is the appreciation?
Looking back, it's likely that those that were most easily offended by the quip may have been the intended recipients of the message. When you think about it, while we are all individually unique in our intellect, talents and approach to the world, we ARE ALL replaceable in whatever role it is that we fill -- on teams, at our companies, in our families and, frankly, in life itself.
If we are honest with ourselves, it is completely unrealistic and naive to think that someone else couldn't step in and fulfill the requirements of a job we hold. But yet, we often like to convince ourselves that this is not the case -- that, because there is no one like us, we are in fact the ONLY ones that can do it. We are entitled to it. We are bigger than the system, if you will.
It is clear that up until this point, Antonio Brown, arguably the most dangerous receiver currently in the NFL, has convinced himself of this. His talent, his work ethic, and his dedication are unquestionable. The teams he has been on have been successful as result (and in some instances, he has perhaps been THE VERY REASON they have won games). Where is the appreciation?
Just like the rest of us, Antonio Brown will soon come to understand that he is not bigger than the system. Right now, he may be paid handsomely for being highly skilled at his job, but there are other equally capable if not better players walking the planet that can catch passes and score touchdowns. And while he may be a unique talent, his output is absolutely replaceable. His teams, the NFL, and the rest of us will survive (and thrive) if he never plays a down of football again.
The lesson here? While we can acknowledge that someone may be able to step into a role that we fill, we can do so knowing that they won't do it the same as we do. The appreciation comes not just from the results we produce as a colleague, teammate, parent, spouse, etc. but HOW we produce them and HOW we impact everyone else around us along the way.
I think this is what Big Dog was probably trying to convey to the team that day many years ago. He wanted people to understand that you are not entitled to be appreciated for your efforts today -- that part can be replaced. You can earn the appreciation from those around you for how you go about your job and how you affect them over time. That is not forgotten. THAT is irreplaceable.
A post script: I ended up leaving that company a few years after the meeting I described (it's where I began my career and I was there for over 11 years) . Big Dog happened to leave a few years later himself. The company we both helped build has managed to continue its upward trajectory since we each left and is doing quite well.
While we didn't cross paths much in the years following, Big Dog and I did keep in touch periodically. The interactions were always light hearted and fun (which was common amongst those who knew him). We weren't especially close, but we shared fond recollections of our time working together at the firm and I was always amazed that he would recall details about my life not many people remembered.
Sadly, Big Dog passed away a little over 4 years ago after battling a number of health issues. He was only 52. He was a remarkable person, and while much time has passed since we spoke, I do still think about him from time to time (as evidenced by this week's intro). I greatly appreciate the opportunity I had to get to know him, particularly at the beginning of my professional life. He may be gone, but the profound impact he and his spirit had on me, on my career and on many others around him is missed and can never, and will never, be replaced...
I know this preamble was a longer one, but thanks for sticking with it. Hope you have some time to check out the articles as well. Enjoy this penultimate weekend of summer.
XOXO
Dave
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