Friends of Dave #280: ketchup is awesome
Do We Listen to the Messages The Universe Sends Us?
Those Friends of Dave with high school seniors know that this weekend is a big one: May 1 is the college decision deadline.
We have a senior in our house and the last month has been riddled with angst and emotion thinking over the next big step that lies ahead. Every kid deals with it differently, but if you have been through it as a parent or guardian you know full well that the process can be exciting in one moment and punishing in the next for adults and kids alike.
In our son's case, having a number of schools from which to choose was both a blessing and a curse. He had held one school on a pedestal as his personal number #1 choice from the start (a sentiment his mother and I did not share for a number of reasons, not surprisingly was the price tag vs. the overall value of the education he would be receiving) but there were at least two others that were interesting and viable options for him -- and actively pursuing him. And then, at the last minute, a school that had rejected him for one program came back with an offer to admit him into the institution but in a separate area of study (one that was close, but not really in his area of interest).
It reminded me of my own process when I was coming out of high school. I went on an unofficial visit to Colgate University 4-5 hours away from home with a friend in the Fall of my senior year. We drove up on a Friday to stay with a buddy of ours who had graduated a year before for the weekend.
Let's just say we made the most of our early college experience that Friday and Saturday from the social perspective.
So with hazy memories of my first frat party and the sticky muck from the floor of the Old Stone Jug still on the bottom of my shoes, I left campus 100% sold on Colgate as the place that where I should grow from a kid into a man.
No Mom and Dad, setting foot into an academic building on the campus or speaking to a member of the faculty would not be necessary whatsoever.
Sure I applied to other schools -- a few reach schools and my safety schools. And I had a few I just submitted to appease my parents (this in the days before the internet and the common application, so everything had to be typed or written out and sent individually). But it didn't matter: Colgate was THE place. Nothing could beat it.
The problem: Colgate wasn't sure it wanted me. Of all of the schools to which I applied, wouldn't you know it was the only one to put me on the dreaded waitlist. I was devastated. Life sucked. I was miserable.
With the May 1 deadline rapidly approaching, I asked my guidance counselor to call Colgate on my behalf. I got another teacher to write another recommendation. I wrote my own letter begging them to reconsider and pledging that I would be forever grateful if they would provide me with the privilege of attending their institution.
Crickets....nothing.
Meanwhile, I kept getting postcards and fielding phone calls from a few other schools that admitted me. One of them, Boston College, had been a school to which I applied just to shut my parents up. They thought Boston would be a great place for me to grow -- but my campus visit there was horrible. It had been hot the day we were there, they took us on this big rambling tour, my parents were with me and there were no fraternities.
I hated it. It was the exact OPPOSITE of Colgate. On top of it, it was where my parents wanted me to go -- not me. But May 1 was arriving. BC wanted me and was the best of my remaining options. So, reluctantly, I agreed with my parents and committed to go to Boston College.
The rest, as they say, is history. My parents, surprise surprise, were right. It was best decision I ever made and I am forever grateful that they provided me the opportunity to attend that school. I cannot imagine what my life would be like had I not gone to BC.
We've all had things happen to us like this at one time in our lives or another. When you look at the lead up to my college decision, was the universe trying to tell me something?
The signs were all there. Perhaps with the benefit of age, experience and hindsight, the answer on what to do now seems simple and obvious. But, back then, perhaps because I was too immature or hyper focused on what I thought would be best for me, I wasn't seeing the signs. I was ignoring the facts and tightly held on to the ideal I had built up in my head.
We all do this to ourselves from time to time, don't we? We complicate the decisions we need to make and situations we face because we don't take a minute to just stop and rationally observe what is being presented in front of us.
Perhaps if we remind ourselves to take a minute to listen to the messages the universe is sending us, we can reduce the stress and angst when we are faced with a big decision or action we need to take.
I relayed all of this to my son this past week in an attempt to ease his anxiety over his big decision. At first, not surprisingly, he dismissed me as all high school seniors can do. He insisted that he was an adult and it was his decision to make. But after some discussion with my wife and I, he ultimately arrived at a place that we all believe will be best for him in the long run.
It didn't end up being the #1 school he had built up to be the "perfect place" -- but it was one where they showed they really wanted him, he would get an excellent education, and he still could pursue his interests and be happy.
Only time will tell how this works out for him. And if the universe sends some messages that the school might be the wrong fit for him, we'll help him course correct if that time comes.
But for now, we are just excited about what the future holds for him...and that, for now, the roller coaster ride is over.....until the next one.....
Back to the long preamble, but some good articles below. Nothing too long or involved so check them out. Have a great one!
XOXO
Dave
Think on This...
How to calm your inner storm When your emotions become too painful and overwhelming, regain control using skills from dialectical behaviour therapy
For Your Day Job...
Are You Solving the Right Problem?
The rigor with which a problem is defined is the most important factor in finding a good solution. Many organizations, however, are not proficient at articulating their problems and identifying which ones are crucial to their strategies.
Your Weekly Dose of Randomness...
Visualizing Design: 196 Flags of Countries Around the World — www.visualcapitalist.com Flags use many common colors, patterns, and elements to convey symbolic meanings. Here we group the designs of flags around the world.
Heinz’s Decades-Long Attempt to Convince Australia That Ketchup Is Awesome Australians grew up with tomato sauce. Heinz wants to sell them (nearly identical) ketchup.
The world’s oldest pants are a 3,000-year-old engineering marvel Strong in some places and flexible in others, the pants were designed for horseback riding.
‘Balls to the Wall’ Doesn’t Mean What You Think It Does The expressions 'balls to the wall' and 'balls out' are derived from engineering--not anatomy. Even so, use them carefully to avoid giving offense.
And The Last Word....
Always Be Suspicious of the “Cool Mom” — airmail.news
Beware the cool mom. She says she’d prefer you and your friends not drink, but, if you must, she’d rather you do it in the house, where you’ll at least be safe, which, I promise, you won’t be.
This one might be a little too close to home for some of the CT FoDs.....
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