Do people look at you as a partner or more like a vendor? My wife is currently taking a graduate business course in marketing. It's her second one, and I always look forward to getting the class recaps when she comes home -- I find it interesting to hear the academic side of common business issues and problems. In a recent class they discussed case studies on pricing and strategies on how to respond to RFPs (request for proposals). Personally, I hate RFPs. I understand that they can be a necessary evil for some large corporations or entities that have an intricate buying process, but I have found that, for the service provider, they are usually a low ROI exercise especially if you did not participate in writing the spec for it. You spend a lot of time filling out forms, putting together materials, and having salespeople and executives jump through hoops so that, in the end, you basically will have to agree to pricing your offering at a loss in order to have a chance to unseat the incumbent. So, given that, I shared with my wife my usual strategy for RFPs. It's one that I am positive her professor did not teach: don't participate in them in the first place. That opened up a spirited discussion about winning business, particularly if you are a startup or a new player looking to gain market share. I told her my position on this comes down to a single point: I'd rather be considered a partner than a vendor.Vendors simply serve the customer. They operate under the blind premise that the customer is always right. They take orders. What they sell isn't special -- it's usually considered a commodity. Their value to the customer is equal solely to their ability to deliver what ever good or service they have that satisfies the customer's defined need, on time, at the lowest cost and with the lowest risk. Vendors are expected to react to whatever the customer tells them without consideration for their own business needs. RFPs are meant to make it easy for a customer to identify friendly vendors. Partners are stakeholders in the success of the customer. They ask questions so that they can gain a better understanding of the needs of the customer. They listen and respectfully challenge their customers to improve a process or think differently so that they can help grow their business. Their value cannot be measured by a price on a spreadsheet, as the value of a good partner to a customer is always greater than the price that they charge. Partners are respected in that they react to customer requests with consideration for both their best interests and that of the customer -- they work to find common ground whenever possible. Partners offer solutions, not products. Most importantly, partners are usually not asked to participate in an RFP.Finally, the biggest difference between a partner and a vendor: a partner is curious. Curious about markets, competitive landscapes, opportunities and threats so they can position themselves as a resource to their customer when needed. Vendors are focused on the transaction -- partners are focused on the long haul.Any of this sound familiar? In your day-to-day, are you considered a vendor or a partner? By the way, this vendor/partner dynamic doesn't just apply to business relationships with customers -- this can also apply to our own personal interactions as well. We all have relationships where we are "vendors" and some where we are "partners," don't we?Whether it's business or personal, here's a simple, quick remedy if you find yourself slipping into the "vendor zone" -- get curious. Stop reacting and thinking transactionally and start asking constructive questions, listen, learn and focus on the long haul. Work to be viewed as a stakeholder in the success of others. Vendors are usually easy to replace. Partners stick around for a while.Speaking about sticking around....after all of that, I hope you'll stick around to check out the stories below. Some good knowledge being dropped and a few laughs as well. Enjoy!XOXODave