Friends of Dave #79: No Ragrets
That's my credo, you know what I'm sayin'?
Earlier this week I was sitting on the couch with my 7 year old son when I could sense that he was deep in thought. When I asked him what was up, he pointed to an area on my leg just above my knee (I was wearing shorts) and asked me "Dad, what is that on your leg? Is that...is that...a scar?"
Sure enough, it was a nearly invisible, half inch scar from an injury I had gotten when I was about 11 or 12. I had been on my knees cutting an appliance box with a box cutter (in order to make some sort of fort or something), was being careless and accidentally sliced myself. Luckily it did not require any stitches, but I remember being pretty freaked out by the whole thing at the time.
I told him an abridged, kid friendly version of how I got it, and proceeded to point out a bunch of other injuries I had received over time (a lot of them came from ages 5 to 12) and more kid friendly stories that went along with them. He listened to the details of each and cringed or laughed when I got to the punchlines. "Wow, you have a lot of scars, Dad. I hope I don't have that many scars when I am as old as you," he said in both the concerned and loving way that a boy his age can say things.
When I thought about it, he was right. I do have a lot of scars. Some have faded and some are still visible, but they each have a story. And each was a result of either a mistake I had made, a misjudgment of some sort, or through some fateful accident that was out of my control. Luckily for me, the majority of my scars are neither too deep nor traumatic -- I rebounded from each experience maybe a little sore or a little bloody (and with a whole lot of stitches) but intact nonetheless.
Perhaps influenced by this, I'm a big believer that the majority of our life experiences, regardless of how they turn out, are not bad ones. As mentioned in the Farnam Street blog post in the first section below, sometimes you can seemingly do everything right and still receive a less than favorable outcome. These experiences can sting or leave you sore for a while afterwards. Conversely, you can have a bad process and through just dumb luck you achieve a great result. It might feel like a nice win at the time, but that does not mean it will necessarily be repeated.
I guess what ultimately makes any experience good or bad is not determined by the result but what we learned from what got us to the outcome. In the long run, understanding when we made a mistake, just got lucky, or were a victim of fate is usually more important than how it turned out. And like our scars, the stories behind our experiences (particularly those that did not turn out the way we wanted or expected) can each provide us with the opportunity to reflect and either keep doing what we are doing, correct our course or help influence the course of others so they don't make the same mistakes.
That's why I like to think that most experiences can end up being a good experience if we really want them to be. So no ragrets....I mean, no regrets. Not even a single letter...
With that, I hope you don't regret reading this week's selections. And here's wishing you and your families a great 4th of July week, where ever it takes you.
XOXO
Dave
3 to Get You Thinking...
Why Bad Things Happen to Good Decisions — fs.blog
Good decisions don't always have good outcomes, just as bad decisions don't always have bad outcomes. Interesting look at how results alone are a terrible way of judging the quality of your decisions.
What the Happiest Places In The World Have in Common — www.theatlantic.com
“The biggest predictors of happiness are tolerance, equality, and healthy life expectancy,”
Citizens’ wellbeing is often the result of careful planning—not serendipity.
Why careers should be mapped for longer lifespans — work.qz.com
“We need a new model,” Carstensen says of the current norms around career pacing. The current one “doesn’t work, because it fails to recognize all the other demands on our time. People are working full-time at the same time they’re raising children. You never get a break."
According to one Stanford researcher, life is arranged all wrong for the modern worker. The age of 66 should no longer be seen as the end point, but closer to the middle.
4 About Data...
The 2018 Big Data & AI Landscape — hackernoon.com
Truth be told: while I love good data visualization, I am really beginning to hate market maps. This one from Matt Turck and colleagues at FirstMark is a little less obnoxious, but still a bit overbearing. That said, the post around it provides some great insights into this landscape -- worth checking it out.
The building blocks to crafting a data-driven culture — www.bloomberg.com
Data and analytics have climbed to the top of everyone's wish list. This along with the emergence of the Chief Data Officer in the C-Suite, promises to transform the way both investors and corporate decision makers view the market.
Why Data Collaboration is the Next Revolution — datafloq.com Sharing of data and data elements will be the next big thing especially for small businesses to stay competitive.
Banks are losing the data war — thefinanser.com
More confirmation that EVERY business is a data business: we may all have relationships with banks, but unless they start to dig deep into committing to customer experience, they are going to be missing valuable data points that will be essential them keep their customers.
And A Few Random Ones...
Why nobody ever wins that car giveaway at the mall — thehustle.co
Ok, besides the fact that no one goes to malls any more.....
Carnies Reveal Their Lives Not All Fun And Games — www.urbo.com
Sure, movies like The Jerk and We Are The Millers might make carnie life seem glamorous, but, sadly, the realities of making kids smile can be harsh....
And The Last Word....
Parents’ Screen Time Is Hurting Kids When it comes to children’s development, parents should worry less about kids’ screen time—and more about their own.